Do you have an aversion to being curious? Or try to ignore the calling for discovery in an attempt to keep yourself safe from life. Does the idea of being curious make you feel insecure, taking you out of your comfy familiar cocoon?
Read about beautiful Jennifer who was taught to avoid being curious by her loving protective mum.
We’re sitting in my therapy room on a warm sunny afternoon right at the bay window which looks out onto our huge tree with autumn gold, ruddy, rustic leaves crisply twitching in the breeze.
The Blue Tits are squabbling away in the branches, in a nice way, and the crystals hanging from the side window captures the sun’s rays. Blessing us with refracted, dancing prisms of rainbow light, splashed across the room.
The lilies are wafting soft, sweet, fragrant particles into the room and Chloe, a songwriter, tells me she is unable to feel joy in her work and relationship.
There’s a long pause, which happens sometimes. So after a while I mention something about Curiosity, enquiring if she felt it was something that featured in her life.
“No way!!” she gasps ‘Curiosity killed the cat’!! My mother taught me not to be curious because it was dangerous.”
You may be interested to know that in the UK in 1598 a play write by the name of Ben Johnson wrote a piece called “Every Man in his Humour“. And who was the first to perform it?
No other than William Shakespeare. Turns out, Johnson’s play was the 1st time this phrase “Curiosity killed the cat” came into print. This may well have given rise to the superstition from fearful mother’s who told their kids it wasn’t safe to be curiose for their own preservation.
Jennifer and I explored her upbringing where we un-packed various golden strands of her childhood. She realised she had been instructed to stick to the tried and tested. The straight and narrow, in such a way that she clipped her wings to please her mum. After all her mum was only trying to protect her from harm’s way.
As the Autumns rolled by, squeezing Curiosity out of the picture became a habit and a lifestyle for Jennifer. This need to reach for safety and familiarity, meant she had swaddled herself in an energetic cocoon that left her feeling like she had a sweetie in her mouth but the wrapper was still on.
Jennifer realised Curiosity is her heroine exposing her to the spirit of enquiry for exploration and to discovery. Giving her the freedom to feel joy, excitement and enthusiasm for life again. Opening her creative expression.
Without the encouragement from her mother to foster the capacity to be curious, Jennifer realised she’d have no inclination to try new things or explore her world. This created stagnancy and inertia. She had been a dutiful daughter and reached for comfort and familiarity avoiding anything that didn’t fit her prosaic world.
Jennifer also realised she couldn’t possibly be motivated to create anything worthwhile, or strive to better herself. She felt only half alive and viewed life as something to fear. All because she was subconsciously suppressing the penetrating and life enhancing trait of Curiosity.
Points to Ponder:
How do you wrap your life into a bubble-like-experience which leaves you feeling like you’re sucking on a sweetie with the wrapper still on?